This is my second in a series of blogs sharing unexpected information I have learned as a professional animal communicator. Some of this you may know, but some may be news to you. I know some of it was surprising to me!
Cats pottying outside the box is probably the number one reason people contact me. I understand the frustration of it myself because our cat, Bea, had become proficient at expressing herself in this manner since we moved into our condo a year ago. In this blog, I will share what I have learned about helping cats use only the box, through both my own experiences, and working with lots of clients.
First off, let me start by saying that unfortunately, cats are wired to behave this way when they are distressed or sick. Not all cats do this, though. Some can be stressed out of their minds and still use only the litter box (my male cats). Some pee outside the box at seemingly the slightest upset (Bea used to until we resolved the issues). I would encourage you to simply not have a cat if this is going to be a dealbreaker for you. Some people can more easily go with the flow (pun intended), and others can’t abide this behavior. Understand this is a part of the species-specific behavior of cats and learn what your cat needs to help her consistently use the box.
Number 1 most important fact: If your cat suddenly begins making the world her toilet, please take her to the vet immediately. My cat, Don Ho, had a severe bladder infection that caused him to squat and try to relieve himself whenever the need struck. A physical health problem is ALWAYS the most important potential cause to be ruled out first, and quickly. Bladder problems can be serious, and you know your cat is in trouble if you see him squat to pee, and nothing comes out.
Number 2 most important fact: do NOT try to discipline or punish your cat for going outside the box. They aren’t doing this just to be an asshole and make your life hell. Attempting to discipline/punish an animal who is already so stressed or sick that he isn’t using the box is only going to confuse and upset the cat even worse. You will have even more pee where it isn’t supposed to be, and it’s also just cruel.
So here are the top 3 reasons I have learned that cats relieve themselves where they shouldn’t if they are physically well, and what you can do about them:
#1 The cat is stressed/anxious, angry, or afraid. Sometimes it’s all of these emotions at once. For some cats, being an indoor cat is soooo upsetting and stressful to them. I understand that we don’t always live in places where it is safe or allowed to let the cat outside. If they are longing for the great outdoors, figure out how they can safely go out. Maybe it’s building a catio (an enclosure connected to a back patio that allows them to be outside, yet screened walls keep them from roaming while they get fresh air.) Maybe it’s buying an enclosure with screened walls and a cover from pet retailer such as Chewy that you can have in your yard. With Bea, we talked with her about why it isn’t safe to be outside alone, so we go outside with her for 15-45 minutes at a time and allow her to walk around the yard. We watch her closely so she isn’t attacked by a wild animal or able to eat some crap that will make her sick. When it is time to come in, I tell her “time to go in!”, and she generally returns inside without a fuss. I also thank her for her cooperation in returning inside when told to do so. Thanks to animal communication, we can enjoy this arrangement with her.
#2 Our stress can be so perturbing to our cats that they no longer use their box. Now that may sound like a load of horse puckey, but think about it. When your partner or roommate is in a foul mood, doesn’t it rather poop on your emotional parade also? We can’t help but sense and absorb some of that energy. It is the same way for our animals—they energetically soak up our stress—but they don’t have the ability to leave the house and decompress. They have to live with us, and if they don’t go outside, they literally sit there and marinate in all that unpleasantness. That is why I usually inquire about the stress experienced by the humans of the house because this is typically at least somewhat a contributor to the issue.
So what can you do about this? For many animals, being able to at least get their feet on the earth for a while can help—it grounds them. I realize this may not be feasible, though. I always recommend a flower essence called Golden Armor from Green Hope Flower Essences that helps protect their energy from stress vibes in the home or outside. I have used it daily for years for both my animals and myself. Here is a link to it:
https://www.greenhopeessences.com/essences/golden-armor
Other suggestions include smudging your house, yourself, and your cat more frequently to “clear the air”, so to speak. Placing protective crystals, such as black tourmaline or black obsidian, in the areas they frequent will help block negative energy. I also put lots of rose quartz out for our cat too. Himalayan salt lamps perched in spots they can’t access will also help.
The other important activity when your cat is upset by your stress is to help yourself feel better and manage that stress more effectively. Regular massage, reiki, naps, fun times with friends and family, yoga and meditation—figure out what is most effective for you and do it. Some folks are raised to put everyone else first and feel guilty about caring for themselves. Please remember, when you take great care of you, you are also taking great care of your cat. If you are having emotional issues, seek a counselor. Even your old stuff, such as unprocessed trauma churning around in your subconscious, can negatively impact a sensitive animal.
#3 Problems with the litter box itself
There are multiple reasons a cat may avoid the box and choose the carpet, and these are some of the biggest:
*not enough litter boxes. You need one per each cat, plus one.
*the litter itself. Their delicate little footies can become pained if the litter is too big. Other problems with litter are either not enough or too much, scented, or not scooped 1-2x daily.
*they have trouble entering the box, such as it’s too high for them to comfortably lift arthritic limbs and climb aboard as they age.
*having a lid on the box—or not. Every cat prefers something different.
*using liners, especially scented ones
*location of the box
You can experiment and change various aspects of the box and see what works. You can also partner with an animal communicator, have a conversation about what the specific troubles are, then make changes. Trust me, it’s a lot easier conversing with your cat via an animal communicator to discover what exactly needs to happen.
Regardless of what is causing your feline to avoid the box, please be very patient when fixing the situation. It takes time and effort on everyone’s part to get kitty into the right place to potty. I had a client a while back with multiple serious challenges to the cat using the litter box, and Bertha (name changed) was routinely crapping on the floors. Her humans were SOOOO stressed by the time they contacted me. During our session, they listened to what Bertha said, and implemented a plan to help her feel better and crap in the box. It took a while, but with experimentation and another short conversation or two, I was pleased as punch to discover she was now doing all her business in the appropriate spot. Her humans were so dedicated to doing all the various steps needed—it was their sincere, consistent efforts that enabled Bertha to feel better and change her behavior.
I mentioned I would share what I specifically have done to help our little girl use her proper toilet. We never thought she would have so many issues with moving into our new condo, but it was an enormous change for her. Beatrice loved her new home, but also had some trouble acclimating. Thus, she pissed all over her favorite bean bag chair (that was hers alone) to the point it had to go into the trash. She peed on both our gym bags, as well as many other locations. Our animal communicator and I talked with her about what was bothering her, answered her questions about her new home, and worked to find solutions. We worked with her natural tendencies instead of against them, and now she pees only in the appropriate places. For example, it delights her silly to pee on crinkly paper, such as packing paper. I bought a solid plastic clothes basket that works with the décor of our living room, filled it with papers, and she can pee in it all she wants. It is easy to toss the papers and clean the clothes basket. If she encounters a box needing to be unpacked (yes, we still have a few of those in the spare bedroom), she isn’t going to pee on it because she can pee on papers any time she wants now. You have to pick your battles, and this way everyone won.
Before I I finish, I want to share the product I use to clean and clear the smell of cat urine. I have used this stuff for years! It works like nothing else I have ever encountered. Here is the link:
Please email me at annie@laughingsoul.org or call/text me at 317-440-8783 to discuss how animal communication can help you and your cat with any litter box woes.
Laughing Soul 